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Poems
& Stories
for "Mom" |
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When God Created Mothers
When the
good Lord was creating mothers, He was into His sixth day
of overtime, when an angel appeared and said,
"You're doing a lot of
fiddling around on this one." And the
Lord said, "Have you read the
spec on this one? She has to be completely
washable, but not plastic;
have 180 moveable parts, all replaceable; run on
black coffee and
leftovers; have a lap that disappears when she
stands up; a kiss that
can cure anything from a broken leg to a
disappointed love affair; and
six pair of hands." The angel shook
her head slowly and said, "Six
pairs of hands...no way." "It's not the
hands that are causing me problems,"
said the Lord. “It's the three pairs of eyes
that mothers have to have."
"That's on the standard model?" asked
the angel. The Lord nodded. "One
pair that sees through closed doors when she
asks, 'What are you kids
doing in there?' when she already knows.
Another here, in the back of her
head that sees what she shouldn't, but what she
has to know, and of
course the ones here in front that can look at a
child when he goofs up
and say, 'I understand and I love you,' without
so much as uttering a word."
"Lord," said the angel, touching his
sleeve gently, "Rest for now.
Tomorrow...." "I can't,"
said the Lord. "I'm so close to creating
something close to myself. Already I have
one who heals herself when
she is sick, can feed a family of six on one
pound ofhamburger, and
can get a nine year old to stand under a
shower."
The angel circled the model of the mother very
slowly. "She's too soft," she sighed.
“But tough!" said the Lord excitedly.
"You cannot imagine what the
mother can do or endure." "Can
she think?" "Not only think, but she
can reason and compromise," said the
Creator.
Finally the angel bent over and ran her finger
across the cheek.
There's a leak," she pronounced.
"I told you, you were trying to put
too much into this model." "It's not a
leak," said the Lord. "It's a tear."
"What's it for?" "It's for joy,
sadness, disappointment, pain,
loneliness and pride."
"You're a genius," said the angel.
"The Lord looked somber, "I didn't put
it there."
By Erma Bombeck